Cancel it out

Sometimes I go to bed feeling so guilty. I didn't play with Scarlett enough. I didn't get down on the ground and rough house with her and throw her in the air or chase her around or read her a story or let her run around naked (and pee on the floor). I forced her to do what I wanted/needed all day. I got mad at her for something small or big, whatever it may be. But still she is only 1. I feel guilty because I forced her to just blend into my day, to sit still and be quiet, instead of blending into hers.

But...sometimes I am a good mom. She can get a cookie at the grocery store and get as messy as she wants. She hates having her nose wiped, I don't bother. She can eat lunch outside and throw her food on the ground. Take a bath as long as she wants. Grab a pudding from the pantry and we eat it on the floor together. We bounce balls for hours and I let her get muddy in the bake yard.

In the end I pray that all the good stuff just makes up the bad. I think that will be my prayer for the rest of my life.

We love her

and she loves...

Stuffing her face

Putting on our shoes

ALL the time-it is an obsession of hers

but has no tolerance if they get stuck

sitting on our couch and watching Curious George or perusing the Ensign

She waves to me when I lay her down for bed and naps, says "good job" when she throws stuff away, oh one other thing...

She loves to eat our kitchen table

I covered it up with stuff that takes away claw marks. I am not amused

Little bit of Paradise

We have been wanting to go on a cruise for like 3 years! The timing is perfect, with work and Scarlett being old enough, so we booked it 2 weeks ago and bam...away we went. Just a quick weekend trip to Ensenada. But oh was it lovely!

Friday-Boarded boat at 3pm. Ate ourselves into oblivion until around 5 pm. Safety drill (good thing nothing happened cause we slept through it), toured the boat, ate some more, then desert, 15 drunk 30 year old men singing karaoke really bad (died of laughter), finally jacuzzi in the chilly air and star less night. mmm perfect

Satuday- Slept in!, gym, seals played in the water while I ran, ate, ate, ate, walked around Ensenada and bought sunglasses, not too impressed with Mexico (don't hate me), I was terrified of getting sick or mugged or sold into white slavery or something crazy, Nick was just as nervous, "jill we have to go back to the street with all the other people", don't think foreign places are our thing, back on boat, ate, ate, ate, sunbathed and read a sappy romance novel (splendid), got all dressed up and went to the country singing/dance show, watched black jack for awhile, tempted but no I did not play, sheesh, midnight mexian buffet (hell yes!)

Sunday- slept in (till 10:30 partay), cold out and overcast (hate california too), got bundled up and sat outside and finished sappy romance novel, played mini golf, talked and talked and like we were dating again:), rest of the day seriously we ate like every 10 minutes, went to another dance/singing show, had a great dinner in the restaurant with 2 of everything, supper funny comedy show, splurged and got 2 pina coladas, watched gambling again and got supper tempted, still didn't play, this guy like bet and lost 500 dollars in 2.5 seconds, temptation decreased, but then he won like 1000 in 2.5 seconds,temptation increased, but then he lost, you get it, did I play?, finished off the night with 2 soft served ice cream cones!

Monday-home to the cutest little girl that I missed, who then threw up all night and I am now again sleep deprived. Oh but i missed her a lot. No matter how much fun a vacation is I will always be excited to come home and see her ( throw up no included).

Pictures is complete random order

(sorry ladies this hottie is taken!)

(our boat, Paradise)